Hot Pants McGee

Peyton's latest fashion statement, I use the term fashion loosely, is to hike her pants all the way up her legs as far as she can and go about her day.  Long pants or capris, makes no difference to her.  She much prefers yoga capri pants, they go up the easiet and stay there the longest.  And when she gets those yoga pants up, she might as well be wearing those teeny tiny spandex shorts like the volleyball players do.

Today's pants are a thicker sweatpant material, think that would slow her down?  No siree.  Not even a little.  These pants don't go as high as her thinner material pants would, be she's going to hike them puppies up as though her life depended on it.  She'll even walk around holding her pant legs up if she has to.  And her legs are about a mile long, so there is a lot of pant leg to hold.

And since they read "If you give a moose a muffin" in school today, I give you my version of "If you give..."

If you give a Peyton some long pants, she's gonna want to hike them up.  And once she has hiked them up she gonna want to walk around and shake her groove thang a bit more than she normally does.  And then her mom is going to discover that she has pulled her pants up to the sky and tell the Peyton she needs to put her pants down.  And once the Peyton has done this, and her mom has gone back about her business of putzing around the house, the Peyton is going to pull those pants back up so fast you never knew they were down in the first place.

And if you give a Peyton a second warning about having her pants hiked up to rival that of a hot pants flight attendant from years gone by, she is not going to be happy.  She might even give you a pouty lip and "humph" all the while crossing her arms and turning her back to you.   This is not going to make her mom very happy.

This might also make the mom come over and pull the pant legs down and say again "Pull your pants down!"  And once the mom has said this to the Peyton, and once again gone back about putzing about the house, the Peyton is going to want to go outside.  And if you let the Peyton outside with her friends, what will be the first thing she does??  It most likely would be to hear her mother scream out the upstairs bedroom window " HEY!!! I SAID PULL. YOUR. PANTS. DOWN!!!!! N O W !!!!!!" (think Mommy Dearest and her love for wire hangers)

This is going to want to make Peyton's mom want to duct tape her pant legs to her body so that the pants may be worn the way the manufacturer intended.  Notice that the mom did not say staple, as that would not look so good to the dad once he got home from school.  And if you give the mom enough grief, she is going to take the pants off the Peyton and put her in shorts because the Peyton surely won't be able to hike up her shorts and have them stay.

Silly mom.  Of course the Peyton will. 

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